A 19-year-old first-time mom snapped at her sister-in-law when she pestered her about how to handle her newborn better. OP readily admitted that it took some time for her to adjust to being a mom.
She and her 6-week-old infant had to do a lot of trial and error when it came to breastfeeding. Her baby finally learned how to latch in a more comfortable position.
OP’s and her fiancé’s next step was to acclimate their baby to bottle-feed in case it eventually became necessary. Their baby couldn’t get the hang of the silicone teats and cried until OP breastfed her.
Instead of forcing the baby to bottle-feed, OP chose to exclusively breastfeed her baby until such time they could try reintroducing the alternative. Her brother’s wife had a lot of opinions about this.
Her sister-in-law made her thoughts known when OP allowed her and her fiancé’s families to meet their baby. She tried to micromanage OP’s every move and pointed out everything she thought the new mom did incorrectly.
OP was soon annoyed by her sister-in-law’s unwanted feedback. She then questioned OP about pumping.
OP explained that their baby doesn’t bottle-feed. She told her sister-in-law that they either dumped the excess breast milk or drank it themselves, which her sister-in-law found disgusting.
Her sister-in-law chose to be condescending about the whole thing. She said OP’s baby didn’t want to bottle-feed because OP did it wrong.
She said OP had to be tough, basically let her baby go hungry, and then introduce the bottled breast milk. Her sister-in-law said it was how she handled bottle-feeding her two kids.
Her sister-in-law also warned OP that her breasts would look bad if she breastfed exclusively. OP said she was not willing to let her baby go hungry when she could easily feed her.
Her sister-in-law replied that she was only helping OP because she knew nothing as she was a “child with a child.” OP told her sister-in-law that she was not a better mom because she was older.
They argued further until her sister-in-law divulged that OP’s brother talked badly about her behind her back. It infuriated OP further. Her fiancé stepped in and kicked the stressors out of their place.
The advice her sister-in-law gave OP was not only unsolicited, but it was also terrible.
Feeding a baby when they need it is not spoiling them or setting them up to become difficult.
Inevitable-Leave2906, SlayersGirl4Life
Her brother’s wife need to update her parenting knowledge before her outdated advice is heeded and harms a baby.
Redditors counseled OP not to throw away her excess breast milk. She could donate it to moms and babies who sorely need it. She just needs to find the right organization to contribute to.
Good on OP’s fiancé for intervening when her sister-in-law doubled-down on her tirade.
Timely_Proposal_1821, Inevitable-Leave2906
They need to apologize to OP for criticizing her and talking badly behind her back. Aren’t they mature enough to be the bigger person?
If the sister-in-law saw something for OP to improve upon, she could have compassionately talked to her instead of being condescending about it.
Her sister-in-law should reflect on what she said. Bottle feeding was better because it wouldn’t affect how a woman’s breasts looked. Priorities?
Her sister-in-law is clearly a competitor, but she won’t win.
Her sister-in-law lost any moral high ground she thought she had when she proudly proclaimed letting her kids starve to preserve the way her breasts looked. But, sure, OP was the mom making questionable choices.
Two good things came out of this ordeal: OP got reassurance that she was doing right by her baby. Second, she could help other moms and babies with the extra breast milk she has instead of throwing it away.
