Inside Oprah’s emotional reflections on her mother

Oprah Winfrey has been a media magnate, an author, and a cultural phenomenon for many years. Yet, behind her glory, her late mother Vernita Lee was embroiled in a turbulent mother-daughter relationship. Born in 1935 in Mississippi, Vernita became a mother at the age of just 18, giving birth to Oprah. Life was hard for a young African-American mother in the segregated South, but she strived to nurture and raise her daughter.

Oprah mostly spent her formative years with her grandmother, Hattie Mae Lee, while Vernita worked as a maid in Milwaukee.

It was Hattie Mae who instilled in Oprah a love of reading and oratory skills that would form the basis of her future success. When she was 6 years old, she was reunited with her mother; however, the next few years were challenging. Between her mother in Milwaukee and father, Vernon Winfrey, in Nashville, Oprah went back and forth. She was abused in her childhood, had a teenage pregnancy, and lost her baby shortly after birth, a secret that went with Oprah into the sky-rocketing fame.

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In spite of all the other obstacles, Oprah garnered wisdom from her grandmother, her father, and her mentors, including Maya Angelou. She decided not to have children of her own but chose instead to be a mother to millions, mentoring young women at her Leadership Academy in South Africa and inspiring people across the world.

In a podcast with Dr. Bruce Perry, a childhood trauma expert, Oprah recalled a time when she had been invited down to talk about her mother. While others shared moments they had with their own mothers — with one girl describing how her mother prepared special lunches, had her boots ready for wet days, and kindly assisted her in taking them off when she got home — Oprah realized such memories with Vernita were few. Still, she said she was grateful to her mother for having her. “She didn’t abort me,” Oprah said, adding that her mother did the best she could.

 

From these reflections, Oprah realized that she could not rewrite the past.

Accepting her mother for what she was brought Oprah to a certain peace and served as an inspiration to listeners confronted with similar battles. Many commemorated the importance of honoring one’s parents who made them in one way or another.

Oprah Winfrey with her mom Vernita Lee and sister Patricia/ OWN Communications

Vernita passed away on Thanksgiving Day, 2018, at the age of 83. Though complicated, Oprah’s mother’s never-give-up attitude helped shape a daughter who would revolutionize the television industry and become a beacon of hope for millions around the globe.